Hello, my loves! I hope you're doing well.
2016 - although it's had it's good times - has been a very difficult year for me. The year started off with a bang, but as time went on I decided to do a bit of quality control. This was mostly regarding the people with whom I associated myself with. I decided to focus more on the quality of my confidants rather than the quantity of them, and that led to the termination of most of my friendships and the loss of my first ever love. Although these changes were for the better, I was still in a whole lot of pain. I now had no one to turn to when I was sad, and no one to count on when I needed cheering up. I was completely and utterly alone, and this made the majority of my year very crappy.
After the demise of all my relationships, I tried to fill the holes in my heart by giving my time to anyone who would notice me. It was almost as if I was bumming cigarettes off of people, but instead of looking for a nicotine fix, I was looking for affirmation. I was looking for someone to make me feel worthy and attractive, and like I actually mattered in society. It was just as toxic, but in different ways.
I knew deep down that this horrible, depressing period of alone time was a necessary detour on my journey through life. It was my chance to rediscover myself and learn who I was as an individual, without anyone by my side and/or unconsciously influencing my decisions. Even though I knew what had to be done, it took me a long time before I was willing to accept it.
Although I'm a very independent person, I hate being alone when it's not by choice. I hate having no one to talk to or spend time with, and that's what my life was for a very long time. From my period of desolation, however, I learned some valuable lessons.
DO NOT RELY ON OTHER PEOPLE TO MAKE YOU HAPPY.
This was the biggest mistake I made when it came to finding true happiness. Whenever I was having a crappy day, I always trusted that I'd have someone to turn to, whether was a friend or a significant other. But what happens when you have neither friends, nor a significant other? You mentally crash. In order to be truly happy, you need to cheer yourself up. Be your own rock and support system. Think of boyfriends and girlfriends as luxuries, not as necessities.
HAPPINESS IS A DECISION, NOT A RESULT OF YOUR CURRENT SITUATION.
Yes, having good weather, a great hair day, and an awesome sandwich for lunch can be ultimate mood boosts, but you shouldn't rely on everything going right for you to look back on your day and say you had a good one. Choose to be happy. Choose not to let any crappy incidents ruin your charmed day on this kickass planet.
TRUST THAT THE RIGHT PEOPLE WILL COME ALONG.
I cannot stress this enough. I'm a strong believer in auras and energies, and I can tell you with the utmost certainty that positive energies attract positive people. When you are genuinely happy, it glows throughout your entire being. It may take you a while to get to that point, but once you are comfortable with being your own entity, you are then ready to develop healthy relationships. The right people will gravitate towards you. It's like moths to a flame, baby!
I am happy to report that I have now found myself and discovered that I am kind of awesome. I am no longer a lonely girl, desperate for love and reassurance. I have learned to be content with just myself, and I don't think I've ever been happier with my life or the people in it.
That's it for today's post! I hope this has helped you in some way, shape, or form. Being alone sucks, but trust me when I say it's a necessary part of life. Just remember, you always have me! I love all of you, and if you ever need someone to talk to, I am here. If you would like to contact me, click on the "Contact" tab at the top of this page. I'd be more than happy to talk to you! You always have a friend in me.
Until next time,