December 31, 2016

Lessons I've Learned in 2016

Hello, my wonderful people! 2016 is nearly over, and I honestly couldn't be happier. 2016 has been the most turbulent year of my life, and I found it extremely hard to be happy or believe there was any light at the end of the tunnel. Throughout 2016, however, I have made more progress within my life than I ever knew was possible. From all of the crappy things I've been through in 2016, I've discovered many things about myself, and learned so many lessons that I will carry with me into the new year.

Let's start with a quick summary of my year to revisit some of the big life events that've taken place during 2016.

Brief Run-Down of 2016

January: Rang in the new year with my boyfriend and his family; a very nice month as I recall!
February: First break-up; mentally unstable for the next 7 months due to lack of closure and utter loneliness.
March: Tried to fill void in my life by talking to other guys.
April: Met new boy; started dating.
May: Quit my job; relationship starts starts revealing its flaws.
June: Relationship troubles; losing money because of unemployment.
July: More relationship troubles; becoming depressed due to lack of money and reason to leave the house.
August: Finally ended relationship with troubled boy; got a new job! 
September: Senior year of high school starts; making new friends.
October: Putting myself into more social situations; starting to recognize the positive changes happening in my life. 
November: Life is slowly getting better; got accepted to university!
December: Finally at peace with myself and okay with being a single entity; met a new boy.

2016 Shockers

I never knew how miserable being unemployed could make me. I hate working, but I hate being broke and under house arrest even more. Not being able to work reminded me of my love for travel and experience, which are two things you can't really do without money!

I can't believe I actually figured out what I want to major in at university. I never wanted to continue my education past high school, but it's hard to be successful otherwise in this day and age. In case you're wondering, I'm going to school for journalism, advertising, and media with a sub-major in print journalism!

3 BOYFRIENDS in 1 YEAR?! I didn't even know that many people could find me attractive! With each relationship came its own life lesson, so I don't feel too bad about it. The boyfriend I started 2016 with was my first true love. My second relationship with a military boy that was 3 years my senior was my way of ineffectively coping with the loss of my first love. The third boyfriend, however, is the result of finally loving myself and attracting the right people because of it. He came along when I least expected it; when I had finally found myself and had actually started being okay with being single! Funny how things work out, huh?

Lessons I've Learned

You know those people that say they're always gonna be there for you? They're lying. They have better things to do than listen to your problems and let you cry on their shoulders. You cannot - and should not - rely on anyone but yourself to make you feel better. You are the only person in your life that you will always have. Learn to be your own rock, and your own support system. Even the nicest people can break your heart.

Although we'd love it if all relationships ended on good terms, that is not always the case. You must learn to be okay with people refusing to hear you out. If they're not giving you the time of day, that is their problem, not yours. If they're deciding to stay mad at you without giving you a chance to explain yourself, they probably don't deserve to be in your life anyway. Do not let their immaturity eat away at you.

Planning is for the foolish, and it only leads to broken hearts and disappointment. I thought I was one of those ridiculously lucky people that would marry their first true love. My boyfriend and I planned on getting married shortly after our 5-year anniversary in 2020, and moving to England right after that. Don't plan. Let life guide you as you go. Go wherever your heart takes you in the present moment. Don't plan your future before it happens; plan it as you go.

You will never encounter anything in life that you cannot overcome, although living through it may seem impossible at the time. Whether it takes days, months, or years, you will get through it and come out the other side stronger and wiser!

Say yes to the things that scare you. Say yes to new opportunities and new people. Say yes to anything that won't cause you permanent damage. Stepping out of your comfort zone can be extremely terrifying and very awkward at times, but you can sit at home on the couch any other day of the week. Every second that goes by, you are never going to get back. Take advantage of the opportunities you're given! The more you face your fears, the less fearful they are.

If you would've told me at the start of 2016 that I would spend my summer nights staying up 'til five in the morning with my sisterly soulmate that I befriended a week prior, or that I would become best friends with a group or nerdy teenage boys, or that I would be dating the most wonderful, outgoing guy that couldn't be more different from me in terms of 'cliques' or 'labels', I would've laughed in your face. This year has taught me that friends (and boyfriends) come in disguises, and that some of the best people for you are the ones that are nothing like you.

That just about wraps up my 2016! This year has been the saddest, hardest, most core-rattling year of my life, but I have come out the other end feeling more whole. It sounds weird, but it's true! I feel like I've discovered a part of myself this year. I learned how fragile I actually am, and how much I desperately need the support of myself. I never had to be there for myself in the past, because I always had people to do that for me. This year has taught me the importance of having a strong psychological foundation.

I am going into 2017 with many scars, but every scar with a lesson that I have learned from. As time goes on, those metaphorical scars will fade and I will be left with nothing but the memories of the lessons I've learned.

I wish you all the best of luck in the new year, and I will see you in 2017 with a new post!

Jordan x

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